We’ve only ever been sued twice in our adult lives, my Sweetie and I.
That’s a blessing in and of itself, I suppose: to be spared (for the most part) of the contentiousness of the courtroom. On the other hand, I like to think that we’re not particularly deceitful or spiteful people, so it came as a jolt on each occasion when somebody decided to haul us into court.
Both lawsuits involved property disputes – the first, some 38 years ago; the next, recently enough that my feelings frankly remain a bit raw over the matter.
“You’ve been served…” These are words that tend to ruin your whole day…
But then into this simmering cesspool of personal emotions dives the wisdom of this week’s scripture passages. Both the first reading from Sirach and the gospel story from Matthew focus squarely on forgiveness.
In the latter, Jesus enjoins us to forgive “not seven times, but seventy-seven times.” And he closes with an attention-getting kicker, noting that our heavenly Father will not show mercy “unless each of you forgives your brother from your heart.”
For his part, Ben Sira offers this noteworthy observation: “Wrath and anger are hateful things, yet the sinner hugs them tight.” Nursing a grudge; letting anger stew: it’s not at all a good look for me – that’s what the guys in my faith-sharing group said yesterday when I mentioned some of the unprintable emotions I’d been harboring lately toward our most recent legal adversary.
And I had to admit they were absolutely correct: My unforgiveness has been changing me into someone they barely recognized. I’ve been giving our courtroom opponent far more than he is due.
I thought about that, as the day wore on yesterday. I thought back to the first lawsuit we endured nearly 40 years ago – and realized I didn’t even remember that guy’s name. He had a hold on me no more. I’d learned to let it go.
That’s a little tougher to do in the present case, while we’re still in the process of paying legal fees and sorting through the turmoil that’s come unbidden into our extended family’s life. But forgiveness has to start somewhere, I suppose. Nor can I harbor hateful thoughts, without also acknowledging a grievous sinfulness in my own spirit.
“Forgive your neighbor’s injustice,” Ben Sira advises. “Then when you pray, your own sins will be forgiven.”
Doggone it, Lord: So You’re saying it really has to start with me?
Let us pause now…to recall that we are in the presence of the Holy & Merciful One.
IHS
With Us Still 